Saturday, February 28, 2009

Avo on toast for dinner and some red

swimmin in a river, thinkin' about drownin'
drowning in a river, thinkin' about swimmin'
yeah
yeah
yeah

Thursday, February 26, 2009

An excellent quote

“[W]here there was nature and earth, life and water, I saw a desert landscape that was unending, resembling some sort of crater, so devoid of reason and light and spirit that the mind could not grasp it on any sort of conscious level and if you came close the mind would reel backward, unable to take it in. It was a vision so clear and real and vital to me that in its purity it was almost abstract. This was what I could understand, this was how I lived my life, what I constructed my movement around, how I dealt with the tangible. This was the geography around which my reality revolved: it did not occur to me, ever that people were good or that man was capable of change or that the world could be a better place through one’s taking pleasure in a feeling or a look or a gesture, of receiving another person’s love or kindness. Nothing was affirmative, the term “generosity of spirit” applied to nothing, was a cliché, was some kind of bad joke. Sex is mathematics. Individuality no longer an issue. What does intelligence signify? Define reason. Desire-meaningless. Intellect is not a cure. Justice is dead. Fear, innocence, sympathy, guilt, waste, failure, grief, were things, emotions, that no one really felt anymore. Reflection is useless, the world is senseless. Evil is its only permanence. God is not alive. Love cannot be trusted. Surface, surface, surface was all that anyone found meaning in…this was civilization as I saw it, colossal and jagged… ”

BSG

I'm watching a television.
There is paint on my arm and I pause what I'm watching.
I think about scraping it off with the Swiss Army knife that is on the desk.
Then I think about the scene in Terminator II where Arnie cuts of the muscles surrounding the structure of his arm.
I think about my arm again, put down the knife and un-pause what I was watching.
It's my favourite T.V show.

Pants on fire

There are people I would have dead.

Ask for poison at a bar.

Underpants on fire.

Be more serious.

Collect old favours.

Find new friends.

Burn a cat.

Give shelter to the homeless.

Collapse a financial institution.

Starve a loved one.

Reject criticism.

Take a lead role in a play.

Spend money you don’t have.

Don’t flush.

Abuse the young.

Beware the investment class.

Look, look at me

Cure venom with venom

Restore something old

Fall in love with that which you cannot have

Steal only from your friends

Remove impurities

Eliminate glamour

Establish correct order

Prioritise your tactical situation

Marginalise your parents

Abuse privilege

Stock your larder

Load your weapon

Identify enemies

Identify non-hostiles

Confirm your target

Embrace impotence

Picard to Farragutt

Fear retribution.

Remain in the que.

Don’t trust.

Smoke is the product of fire.

Cocaine is a hell of a drug.

In time you will be thankful for things and regretful of things.

Get by on charity.

Forget.

One arm is enough.

If the future makes you cry.

Cry.

Tuesday, February 24, 2009

Buck Shot

what i want is for things to be still
silent
predictable
permanent
so i can see them clearly
without bias
and then break them

Casual

i sense imminent collapse
so i am going to leave
all of my friends
all of my family
to the wolves that now chew on their guts

Sunday, February 22, 2009

Maybe fucked

I WANT STRUCTURE AND PEACE

DOWN WITH SEX IN THE CITY

UP WITH SEX AND VIOLENCE IN THE CITY

GIVE ME BOTOX AND GIVE ME SILICON

GIVE ME BREASTS ON MY ARSE AND A

PAIR OF COLLAGEN LIPS AROUND MY

SLIGHTLY SCARRED BUT GREATLY

SURGICALLY ENLARGED PENIS

DESIGN ME BETTER

GIVE ME BEAUTY AND GIVE ME

FREEDOM

GIVE ME AN ARSENAL IN MY POCKET

AND RESERVES OF POWER THAT WILL

NEVER DIMINISH

LET ME LAY ON COOL CONCRETE

BATHE ME IN MILK

STRAIN MY BLOOD TILL ITS CLEAR

Shes ready Jim!

DARE TO CHALLENGE SACRED COWS
DARE TO FUCK A TABOO

FOLLOW THOSE WHO SCARE YOU
DEFEND YOUR HONOUR

SHOCK THEM WITH MUTINY
MAKE IT MORE THAN A SKULL ON A FLAG

DELIVER A REPORT CAREFULLY BURIED
CLASSIFIED BY MEN WHO LIE
SHARE YOUR TAKE ON THIS CRISIS

AN INVITATION TO A LATE DINNER
A REVELATION OF CONSPIRACY

WEAR A DIAPER

SHIT YOUR PANTS IN A CRISIS

I HEARY DIRTY PRIMATE

relief from guilt comes in pill form

A MAN WITH A GUN KILLED

TRAUMA CAN DISTORT THE MEMORY

TURN THE COMPUTER OFF

TURN OFF THE LAMP

BOTH OF THESE DISTURB YOUR SLEEP ALBEIT PASSIVELY

IT’S ENOUGH TO GET EIGHT HOURS PEACE EVEN IF I DON’T GET ANY SLEEP

I GET SCARED

PUNK SONGS ABOUT NOT KNOWING

I DON’T KNOW I DON’T KNOW I DON’T KNOW

VAMPIRES HAVE IT EASY

FUCK THE DARK

FUCK IT

I WILL HAVE LAKSA THIS WEEK AT LEAST TWICE

I REALY LIKE LAKSA

THE CHILLI GIVES ME A BIT OF A HIGH

A LITTLE HIT

WHAT EVER GETS YOU OFF

YOU JUST CAN’T GO AROUND KILLING PEOPLE

YOU CAN’T HIDE SHOTGUNS WITH ROSES

YOU CAN’T STORE ENOUGH AMMUNITION

YOU CAN’T AFFORD PROTECTION

YOU CAN’T BORROW AGAINST NOTHING

YOU CAN’T GO HOME

YOU CAN’T FIGHT THE FUTURE

THE PIECE NEED NOT BE LOADED

BE HAPPY WITH THE PROPORTIONING OF YOUR HAND

DON’T FRET OVER AN EXCESS OF HAIR

SCARS, GROWTHS AND DISCOLOURATION MAY COME BACK INTO STYLE

one zero, zero one

yes to black
no to red
yes to sun and warmth
yes to rain filled clouds
yes to storm clouds
yes to stormy weather
yes to clean shaven
yes to beautiful girls in coffee shops
yes to first thing in the morning
yes to great sunglasses
yes to good morning boat ride

1978

our attitude is bad
and everyone is out of luck
what we need is a good bartender
time at the beach
strong drink
no missles, no guns, no knives,
no victory

i think Bowie is cool

drink more bronzing lotion
they must drink it for they are so evenly coloured
i need bronzing lotion
i need a boob job too
my teeth capped
i need my hair changed too
more importantly
one must consider
the visual combination of fake tanned skin, fake boobs and a penis
on a male body

Wednesday, February 18, 2009

Three sheets...

i've spoken tonight with old and new friends,
and i've spoken to those who fall somewhere in between.
there is such potential in all of these connections.
but right now all i can think of are the guys i fought in school.
the first girl i kissed.
the first girl i fucked.
it's probably to do with the movie i'm watching.
maybe.
it's easy to be nostalgic about turmoil.
and i haven't felt it for a bit but i am unsettled.
restless.
i know what i want but i have to have patience.
booze doesn't help.
and shit,
hollywood does not help either.
well, i guess that's everything.
don't worry.
don't worry :)

Tuesday, February 17, 2009

James Bond

i need a drink.
i already have one, but i need a back up.
something straight.
its like trying to put out a fire with petroleum.

Corpses

the dark is loaded.
what appears is full of young women, bikers and spiders.
carpets of white powder.
it is all on fire.
a flaming invisible with smoke you can only smell.
no heat.
but still it burns, cooks meat, fat and thought.
there is no malice in this place.
it is not a mystery, it is not a dream.
it is where i am forced undead and leave the cold and my ignorance behind.
it is where i run with corpses who i know love me.
it is for these dead, still with me, that i do all i do.

Monday, February 16, 2009

Not here, not now

i can smell excess.
all that hormone reeks.
those men stink of of a hundred rotting boys.
all those hearts consumed,
all that power concentrated into a few small raging carcases.
small conquered animals who will never remember
another thing.

Here i touch on necroscopy

i can force life into dead things.
i can force death to bend.
death is my bitch.
when i speak i make the charred, the diseased, the broken and the wizzened dance.
they do as i say because they love me,
and because they bend the world for me, i love them too.

Cover

We make this our own by using force.
Violence, to put down any resistance.
Violence.
The threat of death is the root of all authority in a world with no afterlife.
I have only this life, this world to treasure.
The threat of it being taking away from me controls my every waking moment.
Bound by a lack of faith and an unending fear of loss i am one with this life.
We all hope for clarity as do we hope for silence and the din of growth.
Nothing is in a straight line, of what we can see there is more.

Hidden thieves lie with a smile that could deliver sight to the blind.

Men peer at men.
Contemplating their lives, examining their own features.
Grooming those they love, watching some fade and others bloom.
In fresh soil, an equal playing field for all.

Not me you idiot! HIM!

FUCK U U R JUST STUPID MOTHERFUCKERS AND I FUCKED UR MOM YESTERDAY SHE WAS HARD TO FUCK BECOUSE SHES HAIRY SO IT WAS HARD TO FIND HER PUSSY WHEN IM FUCKING A FOREST MOTHERCUCKER
u r cokfuckers i fuck ur mom everyday EVERYDAY AND SHE LIKES ME MORE AND MORE EVERY DAY EVERYDAY
i hope yo r proud of ur mom becouse she is only a cheap slut. it costs... hmmm alot NOT only 0 cents for twenty years of fucking, and i dont enjoy it, but she is so sexuall she forces me to do it

WHERE IS MY FUCKING BLEACH ASSHOLES?!?! YOU LAZY FUCKING DOUCHEBAGS

HURRY UP AND RELEASE THE FUCKING

you need to quit

damn pathetic and let him be

and let him be popular and any more your starting

to piss fans off by making pathetic the cool

popular

strong

guy

so damn anoying.

YOU FUCKING PIECES OF SHIT, I CANT PLAY MKV FILES! FUCK YOU GUYS!

S6 halls of bureaucracy

S7 halls of bureaucracy

S8 halls of bureaucracy

S9 halls of bureaucracy

"kitten dick girls"

"You assholes banned me for no reason" does not qualify

Profoundly massive

Sunday, February 15, 2009

some night a little while ago


My lamp is alive and on fire.

I am in space.

It is an expanse beyond my comprehension.

Caught in a loop, without the energy to bust open the universe.

There is something wrong, sir.

Plasma is super heated, super energised gas.

It has strange properties from what I understand.

It can be controlled and manipulated using very strong magnetic fields.

Within plasma, fusion occurs which produces energy.

Currently the energy required to start and control a fusion reaction like this is greater than the energy it produces. Its a real shame.

What the hell is a dechyon?

I know what a tachyon is :)

Decompression works.

Wednesday, February 11, 2009

I cleaned my room tonight, 11th February 2009

to be there.
to be stuck in the past.
to be unstuck from raw knuckles and lazy thinking.
fuck freedom.
give me control.
I WANT TO KNOW.
i want to be healed and i want new chains and binding ropes.
tubs of feel good repitiion.
200-197 equals 3
no tricks.
no gifts.
no free rides.
a face of bruises and purple pump divided by bones
something swollen and irregular
create a box like thing and then break it.
and then this and then this and another and another.

Opium and caramel

if i knew the bible better i would quote a word or two but i don't and it's all bullshit anyway.
know know know keep score all is well soft and hard light bribe.
bribe cunt cunt put sticks together eat at home.
remember to pose.
no more talk.
nightmare luxury and now that i'm off my feet i can relax and consider how fake the dark is.
i mean my dark.
it's a bad horror flick.
a spoof.
a truly awful thing.
most mediocre, all mine.
Completely ununique.

Morning

just prior to leaving i tried to squeeze out an idea.
i could feel it right there, on the cusp of some part of me.
nothing came.
from nothing often comes something.
and so this is it.
a something from nothing.

Tuesday, February 10, 2009

to you, to me

i have an open wound right here.
it hurts likes hell.
i don't want it to get better.
i don't want pretend everything is all right.

Kippy!

I'm on the good mood side.
I'm on the good mood side.

Sacred places. There are sacred places.
Sacred places hide secrets.

Sanctuary. I require sanctuary.
Sanctuary is not a place.

Red Bag, Brown Jumper

Break a lock on a door
Climb stairs.
Fall from a height that hurts but doesn't break.
Enjoy something stupid.

Evening

i can see clouds rolling.
evening sky
there is a woman buying a ticket.
loud engines spoil the moment.
there is something about a full moon at dusk and a close proximity to water that i love.

i hate transparent material.
i love opacity.

pink hue to the clouds now.
lots of cranes in the picture now.
folks walking home.
dogs walking too.
old lighthouse.
more cranes.
a cement factory.
LIVE TEMPO LEASING NOW
theisland
it's 6:06pm
CREST 182
No wash

13th of December 2008

there is no drama.
no peace.
no upset.
no joy.
no longing.
no absence.
what was, is no more.

the world made him and and he was alive.
now he is dead.
no more can be said of the matter.

Mapping time and objects


the days worth living for

there are days worth living for

the people worth living for

there are people worth living for

there are days and people worth loving

Monday, February 9, 2009

To ask for poison at a bar is not logical

There are people I would have dead.
Ask for poison at a bar.
Underpants on fire.
Be more serious.
Collect old favours.
Find new friends.
Burn a cat.
Give shelter to the homeless.
Collapse a financial institution.
Starve a loved one.
Reject criticism.
Take a lead role in a play.
Spend money you don’t have.
Don’t flush.
Abuse the young.
Beware the investment class.

The worst

rape the sea fill my stomach
pervert the land house myself
hurt your heart harden my cock
foul the waters lose my shit
fuck their youth spite my age
thin my blood shut my mouth

Sunday, February 8, 2009

Rollo towny brown town!!!!

Derivation

derive a conclusion
set it alight
cast it adrift
and then
watch it
fall off
the
end of the world